branatttackk

branatttackk @ 2008-11-21T08:29:00

2008-11-21T13:29:19Z

I have no life =[

....

2008-10-22T21:07:59Z

Im sorry.
I never did it in a way to put you down.
&maybe you don't believe me.

=[ This has been the hardest summer of my life,
& it's just getting worse.

All I can say is Im sorry.
I don't know what to do.
Im sorry..I really am.

Im a bitch, I know. =/
Whats new...

....

2008-09-24T02:23:51Z

Things are going pretty shitty.
I hate these cycles, I wish I could just hate him. =[
It's a good thing I'm gonna be able to get away for a few days....maybe.
I don't know, but this happens every time, and I can always predict what comes next.
I'm miserable =/

Only good thing about today was I have no cavities, working out, and flirting with some random boy a publix.
Too bad that happiness was...very short.
uhgskalbgabjlbsidgbailbi!!!! =[

FUCK YOU! =]

branatttackk @ 2008-09-03T21:40:00

2008-09-04T01:47:18Z

I really hate waiting around like this. =[
I should be doing homework...whatever.
I got a new phone today. I really like it. I think it's cute.
I'm gonna go get a bowl of ice cream, which I really shouldn't because I didn't get to run today. =/
I got home too late, and then cooking dinner took awhile, and then Sharon came by to get her makeup.
Bye the time I actually had free time, it was already dark.
This just means I will do at least 1 1/2 miles tomorrow.
I cant wait for soccer to start. It should be a great distraction.

hello stranger

2008-09-02T02:22:50Z

Soooooo this is being written while I'm at The Capitol because I am bored and I have Sara's macbook!
& I just had to help TB carry water for Paddock Park.....hahaha.
I haven't really updated for a really long time. I think the beginning of summer.
The only new exciting thing that I can think of is I am going to Europe!
Well kind of, Ashley I are looking into it right now. Maybe even Japan?
It would be so much fun and it will be like our Senior trip!
I don't even feel like a Senior yet. =[
I guess it's just because I'm not really doing anything really big after high school like moving away and going to a huge university.
I'm still not even 100% sure what I am going to do yet. I know for sure CFCC for at least a year, or maybe a semester, but idk.
I know I would miss Ocala, even though it is dumb most of the time, There are a select few people I would miss a lot though.
I'm going to visit Sara this weekend because it's another 3 day weekend! AND school will probably be canceled because of hurricane Hannah!
I know Hannah is pretty excited about being a hurricane!
Did I mentioned I am so fucking bored! AND we have like 4 waters left.
My iPod died for good a few days ago. =[ It really sucks not having one, just because of my car. It's a huge pain to listen to CD's with my forward button broke. I should really get my dad to fix that.
I should be getting a new phone soon tooo!
My contract is up on the 7th, so I can get the LX for real cheep.
I'm playing soccer this year too! Well I'm going to try.
I've been running/jogging/power walking a mile a day ( shane told me " A Mile A Day" would be a good band name lol)
I really need to condition, I am so out of shape! Soccer should be really fun this year too because I will be really relaxed about it and it's not going to be anything suuuper serious. The show is almost over and I've ran out of things to sayy.

Wait, one last thing. It must really suck to be so fucking alone all the time, but when you do it to yourself I can't really give you pity.

branatttackk @ 2008-08-29T23:12:00

2008-08-30T03:13:05Z

I'm going to EUROPE!!!!! =]

Get ready for this

2008-05-13T00:50:59Z

I have so many things running through my head right now.
I feel... great/gross/bad/wrong/excited/confused/blah.
All of my emotions are in a huge jumble right now.
Everything is outta wack.
Im failing math,
My papa is in hospice with an estimated 1 week left. =[
my mom is getting on my last nerve with all her "im fat" remarks.
It's really killing me inside.
& then to top it all off,.....
yeah.

I wish I could explain more, but that will come later.
Much later. =/

cant wait till summer.
hopefully I can just sleep all these feelings away.
It's beginning to get really annoying.

branatttackk @ 2008-04-20T15:05:00

2008-04-20T19:16:45Z

newnewnewnewnewnewnewnewnew.
Yeah, that is what I have been craving.
Things are so fucked up right now.
Well with certain people.
& I'm sure it will soon be rubbing off onto others,
but right about now, I don't care.

I feel good.
About life and everything in between.
And hopefully the newness I crave will be fulfilled.
I think I found it, as long as it doesn't get away.
I not too worried though, it's different this time.
& as much as I really needed someone to talk to about all this,
you were gone. You didn't seem to care. It really sucked.
I got over it. Its all over, and done. & I don't really want to anymore.

This week has been so fucked up,
bad then great.
Whateverzz! =]

Everything is falling into place. I'm not going to let anyone in the way of this.
And im not sharing.
I know im selfish.

[ohh and I sprained my ankle. BLEH! it's all greeeeeen! haha. it should be better in a day or so though. ]

"I'm going on a bender this weekend"

2008-03-18T04:48:43Z

Goodbye Ocala.
I am venturing into a week long break from chaos,
&I bet I will return refreshed.

Everything is so weird right now.
In most cases I can tell when I'm not wanted.
I can tell when I do something wrong.
I can tell when it is my fault.
I can tell when I am right.
I can tell when I'm wanted.
I can tell when i am being used.
But this is a different case.
I am so sick of everyone and their fucking mood swings.
Things are rough, yeah I know.
I am going through all the same fucking shit!
My Grandma is going through chemo, as well as my Papa, and my other grandpa.
My Grandma looks like she will be fine, but I'm not so sure about the other two.
My grandpa lives in Tampa, so 2 hours to go see him isnt baaad,
But whe you have to drive 16 hours to visit the other two,
It gets to be a bit of a struggle.
So needless to say, I have a lot on my plate.
& This isnt the only thing. =[
I wish.

So please do yourself a favor, don't come searching for sympathy from me.
It might sound selfish, but I need to keep it to myself right now.
There is no room for sharing.

Sorry for the above bitchiness, but what goes unsaid goes untouched,
and that needs to be taken care of.

I really do not know what is going on, like with everything.
everything is falling apart but at the same time falling into place.
Im not sure what I am even doing, but whatever.

Can't we just all get along?
Maybe I just need to stop trying.
I might just end up trying that option soon,
because I am just so damn tired of trying.

Blehhh.

It really sucks when you miss someone you nevar thought you would miss.
When you know it's there you don't care,
But when you can't reach it anymore,
you care the most.

"i'll run and hide under my bed
you're calling my name from outside my door but i'm not ready yet
for a revolution to start in me

'cause i'm just scared of losing control
i'm terrified of who i'll become with you
i'm just scared
the world hates you and it's gonna hate me too"

branatttackk @ 2008-03-04T19:23:00

2008-03-05T00:26:55Z

FUCKKKKKK!

It's the only word I can muster to even try to explain the events that have occured in the past week.
=[

I don't know what I am doing.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know what is right.
I don't know what is wrong.
Im numb.

branatttackk @ 2008-02-24T09:54:00

2008-02-24T14:54:52Z

Mercy, mercy, mercy me.

2007-12-29T21:08:32Z

As much as I would like to believe this.....

"I ended up in a sticky sketchy situation till like 1:30"
"My friends weren't listening to me
got their money stolen"

I just can't bring my self around to it.
I learned my lesson.
& im not about to start feeding myself lies...again.
I wasn't really expecting anything,
just catching up, was all I wanted.
& it turned out to be a pretty nerve racking day because of it.
OHHH JEEZE!

Well hopefully next time will work. =]

This Christmas break has been wonderful so far.
I don't want to go back to school.
I still have to write an essay, and I have some math homework that needs to be done.
I got a Wii for X-mas!
It was a total and complete shock!
I didn't ask for it at all. I love my mom.
Well hope everyone is having a good break too!
I miss everyoneeeeee! =]

branatttackk @ 2007-10-29T20:14:00

2007-10-30T00:16:59Z

I love it when things have a way of working themselves out.
And I have learned, communication is KEY in anything.
=]
=]
=]

I just need to remember that for next time!

YAY for tomorrow!
I love A days!
I have a good lunch, and I have French with people I loveee!
Heh, ohh and the big dark girl!

branatttackk @ 2007-10-27T23:38:00

2007-10-28T03:40:26Z

GAHHHHHHHZZZZ!
IDK IDK IDK IDK!
I really do not know what to think of tonight.
=/

branatttackk @ 2007-10-23T17:36:00

2007-10-23T21:40:05Z

New friendships = New enemies. =/
I guess thats just the price I have to pay.

WONDERFUL!

But I just have this feeling,
its all going to be worth it in the end.
=]

jkfal!

2007-10-22T19:48:22Z

I don't even know whats right on anymore.
Ha!
Taylor and I are hanging out today...
I'm not quite sure what to think about all this.
Whatever, I'm sure it will be fun.
I think we are going to Goodwill!

I have spent a lot of time there lately,
Hah, kinda gross, but none the less FUN!

I don't have any homework and it feels funny.
Ohh, & I think I have an ear infection. =[
Idk though because I have never had one before!

This week is gonna be super busy =]

kafjiulgfuieba!

2007-10-20T02:51:11Z

I feel gross.
=[

It's the weekend, & it should be good.
YUCKK!

branatttackk @ 2007-10-14T21:07:00

2007-10-15T01:22:19Z

This weekend was nothing less than eventful.
&IDK anymore. =[
It kinda makes me sad.

Me and Shane have been talking a lot lately.
I wish we could talk in person.
Stupid girlfriends =[

My car should be fixed tomorrow!!!!!
&The new Steel Train is really good.
I just can't wait for November.
October has been so shitty.

Nov 4th - Ace Enders, Kevin Devine, & Steel Train @ The Social !!
Nov 9th - Against Me! @ House of Blues !!
Nov 24th - Streetlight Manifesto @ State Theater !!
Nov 25th - Brand New @ House of Blues !!
Dec 4th - Hot Rod Circuit @ The Social !!

&&&& IDK what else!
But im sure lots more!

Across The Universe on Tuesday with the Hannah!!!
I'm excited!

Bite my tongue!

2007-10-08T21:00:38Z

My car over heated again. =[
Idk why, but its fucking annoying!
It's going to the shop tomorrow.
Hopefully nothing too terribly wrong.

Today has just been so BLEHH!
It's good at times,
Then it gets grossssss!!!

UHGHHHHHH!!!!!

Ohh Today is my dads birthday!
we got him a navigation system thing for his car.
It's super cool and I can't wait to use it.
& I want a Wii reallllly bad!

My little heart attack.

2007-10-02T21:51:25Z

[this is just one long ramble that means nothing]

Im done.
School.
People.
It's taken me this long to realize.
But I guess it was well worth it.
Sometimes I hate not being a morning person.
It makes me do crappy stuff.
=[

School has been so weird lately.
& That makes me weird.
It's like the classes I hated last year,
I am loving this year. &Vice versa.
I hope I don't fail TV, but with the way it going,
It's not very good.
Dani never does anything!
& It doesn't help that I missed that class today,
but I just can't stand some of the people.
All I would like is some respect.
It doesn't matter if you are a senior or a junior,
TV3 or TV4, or even TV5!
We are one class, working on videos.
I would really like to start my animation again...
& Mr.H has mentioned something about it,
except he keeps assigning more assignments,
videos I couldn't even imagine doing videos on. =[

BLEHH!
&it doesnt help that im not sleeping good at all right now.
Yeah, I know everyone has insomia...
Seriously, I can't sleep.
Im tired of depending on pills to make everything better.
I guess that is just our genaration though.
"Something wrong? OH well there is a pill for it!"

Is it Christmas Break yet?
Thats all I want.
So I can just lay in bed for 2 weeks.
I won't have to think about anything.
Just worry about what im getting for Christmas.
What awful Holiday Barbie I will be recieving from my grandmere.
What CD's will I have to find on torrents due to my list being a gazillion miles long.
Why I still haven't organized my iTunes/ iPod.
When I will clean my room.
When I will really start to get organized.
What kind of desert will I make for Christmas Dinner with my moms family.
If there will be food at my mom/dad's Christmas Dinner's that contain no meat.
School will be the last thing on my mind.
That is what I need so much right now.

I wish I had more freckles.
I wish I had longer hair.
I wish I was REALLY smart.
I wish I could FLY!
I wish I still had relationships with all those friends that faded.
I wish my pride was not so big sometimes.
I wish I was a morning person.
I wish I was more of a night person.
I wish I could sleep less and feel more rested.
I wish I could sleep!
I wish I could keep a conversation.
I wish I wasn't so awkward.
I wish I could get Quinn out of the kitchen!
I wish my creativity was stronger.
I wish I could think on my feet.
I wish I couldn't lie.
I wish I had a photographic memory.
I wish I could remember everything!
I wish I could forget everything!
I wish that idk.
I WISH...

branatttackk @ 2007-09-16T19:44:00

2007-09-16T23:46:45Z

PainVicodinStarvationPainNotEatingForThreeDaysPukeIv'sHospitalsAntibioticsCuteBoysTakingMyBlood&HoldingMyHand
PAINPAINPAINPAINPAINSwollenPlasticHospitalBraceletsNeedlesYuckyMedicineAuntFanny's@3amCatScansPainBedTryingToSleep
NEVER GET YOU WISDOM TEETH OUT!

Alright, so at first it wasn't that bad. Yeah I couldn't stop crying because my mouth hurt but I though that was normal.
Then after the third day where I couldn't eat anything without it coming back up it started to get a little ridiculous.
ANNNNND the left side of my face was HUGEEEEEEEEEEEE!!Seriously.
So last night i decided to go to the hospital. I had to get my first IV EVER! It was scaryyyyy.
And since im so tiny they had a really hard time finding my veins and the first guy messed up on my left arm.
Then the cute one held my hand and he was able to do it on my right arm. haha=].
I also had to get a cat scan =[ yuckkk it was weirddddd!!!!!!

But, now I feel excellent besides a little discomfort in my face=]
I will probably be at school tomorrow for math then I will go home,
Because my face is swollen and it looks like I have a tumor growing on my faceee! Haha
and I can't talk too well.
Hope everyone had a swell weekend!!!!

Hmmph

2007-07-19T20:02:51Z

CREEPY!
....idk maybe not.
But I would like to think it is.

branatttackk @ 2007-07-09T21:31:00

2007-07-10T04:18:13Z

I just bought tickets to see Harry Potter at midnight tomorrow,
Im really excited too.
Im such a loser but w/e.

Im going camping in like 3 days too!
I'm kinda excited.
Like its gonna be boring I know, and 5 consecutive days with my parents GAHHH!
There is still the possibility for fun though.
We are getting a golf cart. Hehe
& I have my camera to keep me company,
pluss im thinking this will be the perfect time to try and knock out all of my summer reading.
I guess im just excited to get away.
Friday we are going to Discovery Cove, only bad thing is they say no jewelry but there is no way in hell im taking my lip ring out.
I'll deal. Im thinking i will just put a band aid over it and look like a freak.
Idk.
We might go to SeaWorld too but im not sure. We get like a 7 day pass to SeaWorld/ BushGardens so it will be free I guess.
I will just have to wait and see! =]

So I got my camera, its sooooo prettyyy!
Uhh, I love it so much.
It's weird to think that you can attach yourself to materialistic objects like we all do.
Like my ipod is my baby,(Sorta)&
Now im so attached to my camera.
Idk, it's weird, but it takes good pictures.

&&& Yesterday Hannah and I went all around Ocala searing for some cool places to take pictures.
We actually ended up in some pretty neat places, and I got a funny story of of it too!
So we had stopped at some broken down little lot around downtown, and I was taking a picture,
when these two boys rode by on their bikes.
They stopped and were all like hey are you a photographer.. Blah...Blah..Blah.
& somehow one of the boys was like well I can be a sock model, then the other was like I can be an underwear model.
It was great and i was just like hah okay, THENNN
The one boy unbuttoned his pants (i was scared he was gonna take em off completely)
then lifted up his shirt, I was obligated to take at least one shot. Haha

I have to pee!
<3

branatttackk @ 2007-06-16T16:27:00

2007-06-16T20:45:00Z

Let's time travelll!!
Cauuseee all I want is last summmerrr!
It's weird,
It was the BEST/WORST time of my life!
A crazy roller coaster of emotions,
And plusss I was spending all of it with one person that I loveeeee
Bring it back pleassseee!

Scramble those eggs I like em Scrambled with cheese

2007-05-31T15:52:02Z

I just woke up from an 18 hour sleep.
[i think thats right]
I went to bed at 6 yesterday evening, and awoke at 11ish.
blehhhh!
I have a horrible sore throat!
&A stuffy nose. =[

I got my lip pierced a week ago.
=]
I love it!

Also, I got pulled over by the cops after cewfew,
All because my brake light went out.
It was a fun little adventure with ashuhhleyy though.

&Daytona was just plain creeeeeepy!
Old creepy people and seafood buffets are not fun.
BUT
The best part of this 1st week of summer has beeeeeeeeen..
............................[Drum Roll].............................
Me recieving my garden gnome from ASHHHLEEYYYY!
It now has a nice home buckled up in the back seat of my car,
it's a 2 in 1 kind of deal too, but they don't have names yet.

Ohh, & Ggarage band is allllottttttttttt of fun trust me!

I feel like taking a picnic!